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You just have to find a normally non-sexual object or action arousing—an association you probably formed in childhood, says Samantha Leigh Allen, who studies sexual fetishism at Emory University.
Related: How to Pleasure a Woman—the Men’s Health Guide to Becoming a Master Lover And in these cases, “most people with fetishes are able to integrate it into their life,” Jacobey says.
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So which “strange” sexual proclivities are most common—and how can you encourage your partner to embrace yours? “There’s so much eroticized imagery around high heels,” says Allen.
One in five women are more excited by a new pair of shoes than their sexual partners, according to a new survey by “They’ve become a symbol of feminine power and aggressiveness—of men’s craving for female dominance.” In some cases, though, a shoe fetish may actually indicate a desire to avoid real sexual interaction.
The reality: A fetish is just a specific type of fantasy—and one that more people have than you probably realize.
D., a sex therapist who specializes in alternative sexual behaviors.