Aa recovery and dating
It isn’t your job to safeguard their sobriety—and someone firmly grounded in recovery won’t expect you to—but as a member of their support network, you’ll need to encourage them to prioritize their recovery, sometimes even over you.
You also need to assess how much baggage you can handle. They may have accrued debts, a criminal record, or legal problems, or irrevocably damaged key relationships in their lives that make your interactions with their family and friends tenuous.
Of course, not all addicts relapse, and those that do are often able to get back on track before too much damage is done—but the threat is there nevertheless.
If you move forward with the relationship, be aware of a few unique aspects of dating someone in recovery.
Recovering addicts don’t expect perfection in their partners, having learned firsthand that it doesn’t exist.
Then they drop a bomb: “I used to be a drug addict.” To some people, they may as well have said, “I’m married.” But does one partner being in recovery automatically spell doom for a relationship?
If you are in a relationship with someone in a.a., n.a. I was certainly going to share more as time went on.
or the weekly bridge game, you are intimate with them. The person started googling me and found a mug shot from an arrest a decade ago from one of those extortion websites ( I will be joining the class action suits) , especially since I was never actually charged with the crime and successfully completed treatment and the drug court program.
I am worried that he's not stable enough, though, and that the relationship won't stand a chance until he's really back on his feet (including finding a new job). I get the time has passed but your situation is interesting. One year sobriety in my book is strongly recommended. I mentioned this one evening as we were discussion his issues and recovery.
If an addict cannot handle being sober for one year, I would fear for your physical safety and your sanity if you were dating him as caring for someone who continues to relapse is exhausting. I said to him that I didn't mind going through it as I came out of it as a stronger person. I recently met someone and it was going quite well.