Dating immediately after divorce
Dating after divorce is tricky too, and I’ve found some things I think are good indicators of how whole a person is, and how ready they are for a healthy relationship.
Sure, your dating profile says something like, “Let’s be friends first and see where that takes us.” But most people I meet are really hoping that friendship takes us to the next wave of affection. We have found our own way out of the desert of depression and despair. Their divorce is still too painful, or their relationship with their ex is still too volatile. If, however you begin to think your shit is sufficiently together to date again, some new boundaries are in order.
We stopped cheerleading and became more of a negotiator, or even antagonist.
Listen to yourself as you talk about the relationship as well.
That’s never worked for me, but if that’s your thing, make sure that’s what the other person is saying as well.
If the person cannot give you a good idea of what they are looking for, how their next relationship might look or feel, they may not be ready to be in a relationship.
Or perhaps the child was overly shy and withdrawn, folding themselves into the parent.
I’ve heard that some people are into casual dating and casual sex.
I have a deep respect for my role model as a dad, and as a man.
I am showing both my daughter and my son how a man acts in the world.
Don’t get me wrong, a good sexual chemistry is a powerful motivator.
But don’t let the sex cloud your understanding of who the person is, and what other things you like to do together. And initiation of sex shouldn’t cause major shifts in the relationship.