Sitting in a tree dating

” says he, shimmering in the candlelight.“You were so at home within yourself,” you reply.“Waiting for me to arrive.”“I felt so grateful,” he says. You must have left door # 3 ajar, and now all those disembodied heads have galloped off to greener pastures.Looking into the glazed eyes of their near-extinction, you realize you need to get out of the tree house some more. Sometimes, harvesting the ancestral lemon crops and grooming the heirloom hunting trophies makes you feel a little sour and mummified.Suddenly, you have an idea — and being in the habit of acting first and thinking later, you announce to your troubled trophies, “Tonight, I have a quantum date with my destiny.”Back in the library, you wave your feather wand in the air.Best to look good for your quantum date with a lighter destiny.You rest your palm on the handle of door # 1 and take a breath of fresh air. He enters the library wearing nothing but a loincloth — which seems like a bold fashion choice for a first date.Long limbed and muscular, he prowls around the room and pauses beside the green velvet curtains, his tawny skin glowing golden against the deepest shades of green.

Perhaps there’s someone smarter waiting for you behind door # 2? “Welcome to your sweet autonomy.”Sinking deep into the driver’s seat, draping your hands over the wheel.

Your trophies gaze upon all this in wide-eyed wonder.

Feeling rather proud of yourself, you comb your fingers through your hair and straighten the pinstripes on your pajamas.

Taking care not to tear the fabric of your multiplicity, you draw three magic doorways in the middle of your library.

As the doors’ sparkling edges begin to fade, you watch your three portals into improbability become as real as any other doorway in your tree house.

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But reading the fine print, you are disappointed to learn that ‘Quantum Dating’ is not, technically speaking, the kind of dating you were hoping to do.

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